Must Read press Release - Very Funny

[Iceaxe]

I read a lot of press releases but this one is a must read.... Finally after reading dry, ho-hum press releases about the yada-yada-yada driver thrilled to finish 39th after crashing on the tenth lap, we have Jake Thompson's...

[quote]Driver News: Jake Thompson - SKUSA SuperNationals XIII Preview
November 16, 2009

For the first time since 2004, Canadian Jake Thompson will make the trip south to Vegas for the prestigious SKUSA SuperNationals where he will be racing in the Stock Moto class for the Overdrive/PCR team. This season Thompson competed in the Volkswagen Jetta TDI Cup, where he collected two wins, 3 podiums, and finished 5th overall in the final standings. Unfortunately, his affection for dirt, grass, tire walls, and basically all things not asphalt cut short his championship dreams.

Having raced cars all year, Thompson arrives in Vegas overweight, and out of shape, and to be honest merely finishing will be seen as a success. That said, he can look back on a string of impressive past performances as motivation.

2000 SuperNationals (80cc Jr): Top driver from Calgary, AB in 80jr. Intelligently faked an incident to avoid the indignity of being lapped by Alex Speed in the Final.

2001 SuperNationals (80cc Sr): Won a heat race. The heat was conducted at night resulting in the 5 drivers running in front of him spinning off when they couldn