Agree or not?

[Last Child]

WOW! I'm really loving all of your responses as I am struggling to maintain a balance in my household during this election time. I think what's happened for me is that I now look at this man that I've had kids with and care about and I now feel so DIVIDED because we are complete opposites. And that's what I don't like, feeling this division. I guess I prefer to not argue and it's been almost impossible to NOT argue over our political views. I am DEFINITELY spunky and sassy, but will do anything to not argue. Lover here and not a fighter as well. Thanks for all your input.

This is a tough one. It takes two people to "divide". Arguing can be a good thing. Depending on how it is done. If it can be done without personal insults and such and without any preconceived goals then it can be very constructive. The problem I have found is that most people don't argue to "just" argue and to share opinions. They argue to try to "change" the other persons outlook. When done with that attitude it's a lost cause.

Maybe you two can talk about that first. If two people can go at it with the understanding that it is OK to have a different opinion and it is OK to agree to disagree then that takes off a ton of pressure and I think that you will find the discussions to be much more enjoyable and productive. I have also found that it makes it easier for both parties to be "open" to the other opinion and be willing to "change" if they find the other opinion a fit.

I will be sending out some positive "Arguing Ju Ju" your way!

[TreeHugger]

My husband leans republican and I democrat. We have great conversations, or on certain things, just leave it be. :-)

[shlingdawg]

I can't stand to talk politics with my wife. If I wanted to hear a crappy opinion; I'd fart.

[Sombeech]

If I wanted to hear a crappy opinion; I'd fart.

You are missing a signature, and I believe you should use this line.

[blueeyes]

i voted it depends

i could not be married to someone who at the very least did not respect my right to form and express my own opinion. i would intern do the same for them. respect in marriage is #1 on my list.

if you are extremely strong willed and very passionate about politics then i would think it best that you were married to someone who held similar values

if you are someone who pays attention to politics, had your opnion, but didnt let your feathers get ruffled over a different view point... then you most likely could live with that person and their views.

and i dont think it is shallow if you do have religious beliefs or political views that are strong and choose not to marry or date some one with a differing view point..... if your feelings are truly that strong and you do marry the opposite and do not have the ability to respect that persons right to have their own mind then it will only cause massive issues.

[Last Child]

i voted it depends

i could not be married to someone who at the very least did not respect my right to form and express my own opinion. i would intern do the same for them. respect in marriage is #1 on my list.

if you are extremely strong willed and very passionate about politics then i would think it best that you were married to someone who held similar values

if you are someone who pays attention to politics, had your opinion, but didnt let your feathers get ruffled over a different view point... then you most likely could live with that person and their views.

and i dont think it is shallow if you do have religious beliefs or political views that are strong and choose not to marry or date some one with a differing view point..... if your feelings are truly that strong and you do marry the opposite and do not have the ability to respect that persons right to have their own mind then it will only cause massive issues.

Good post!

Also I must apologize here to sportsman! I had just got home from having my sinuses drained yesterday and the drugs had yet to kick in so I was in a bit of pain and was ornery as hell and being quite an ass.

So please accept my apology mr sportsman. I was out of line.

Edit: I think that maybe I should add an apology to abirken. After rereading my post I feel as though I may have been or appeared to have been insensitive to your situation at hand. So definitely not my intent. I am oh so sorry!

I hope that you are finding some happy middle ground here.

[abirken]

i voted it depends

i could not be married to someone who at the very least did not respect my right to form and express my own opinion. i would intern do the same for them. respect in marriage is #1 on my list.

if you are extremely strong willed and very passionate about politics then i would think it best that you were married to someone who held similar values

if you are someone who pays attention to politics, had your opnion, but didnt let your feathers get ruffled over a different view point... then you most likely could live with that person and their views.

and i dont think it is shallow if you do have religious beliefs or political views that are strong and choose not to marry or date some one with a differing view point..... if your feelings are truly that strong and you do marry the opposite and do not have the ability to respect that persons right to have their own mind then it will only cause massive issues.

I agree with Last Child in that I think your post made the most sense to me. You really do see all sides to the situation. THANKS chica!!

[abirken]

Edit: I think that maybe I should add an apology to abirken. After rereading my post I feel as though I may have been or appeared to have been insensitive to your situation at hand. So definitely not my intent. I am oh so sorry!

I hope that you are finding some happy middle ground here.

You have no reason to apologize darling. I love reading your responses and appreciate your input. Get to feeling better!!!!! TAKE THE DRUGS. HAHA!! In the meantime, we just don't discuss it anymore b/c we have to respect one anothers differences. I'M TRYING.

[denaliguide]

if your disagree totally on your respective political opinions then as long as you both either vote or don't vote the results are the same. you cancel each other out. which is what happens in our house.

to me it's all about the hoo haw, not politics.

[Last Child]

It should be all about love and respect for your spouse. There is no way two people will always agree on every topic. If you truly love someone you have to learn to respect their view. You don't have to agree with that view but you do have to respect your loved one.

Also there is no guarantee that one of you won't have a change of mind or attitude about some sort of topic over the years. Right now is a very good example of that. There are some die hard republicans that have had a change of heart after the fiasco of the Bush years and seeing that Mcain may not be much different/better. So is true with democrats and having to vote for Obama. Same goes with religion. Many decide to leave a religion or change a religion or get a religion. So what are you going to do? Leave the one you love?

A marriage is all about love, understanding, and respect.