When We Die, I Hope Better is Said of Us

[tallsteve]

A friend sent this to me from a California newspaper. I sincerely hope my obituary isn't like this and I hope yours isn't either. What a wasted life!

[bbennett]

Wow! I've always hoped that I would somehow be able to make a difference and at the very least, leave my mark on this world before I die, but I don't think I'll ever have to worry about doing that poorly.

[JP]

I made it a bit easier

You wonder if it's even true

[devo_stevo]

Well, I am not even sure what to say to that...

I like to think that we can all do better than that though. I am with JP. Wonder if it's real...

[tallsteve]

According to Snopes.com: "True".

[rockgremlin]

Snopes says "true"


http://www.snopes.com/media/iftrue/obituary.asp

[Last Child]

In other words...

GOOD RIDDANCE!

Wow! Well if it was honest and true, then what can you say?

There are those types of ornery and unhappy people here on this earth that seem to make everyone around them miserable. Maybe this is just their way of getting closure. Or maybe payback for a lifetime of various troubles?

Whatever it may be I hope that this person finds a much better and more tranquil existence in her next phase.

May peace find you Dolores!

[JP]

Maybe this is just their way of getting closure. Or maybe payback for a lifetime of various troubles?

In any case, it's still a mother and that's just a bad thing when you screw somebody in death.

[Redpb]

I had a grandmother like this. It was really sad. Before she died she had left details on where she wanted to be buried and had purchased a plot for it. Her two sons cremated her and saved some money. The funeral was much like this obituary nothing but 'thank goodness she's gone, etc...'. Now, she was an angry old woman and always complaining but this was just sad.
We all walked out of there wondering WTH just happened.

[Deathcricket]

Maybe this is just their way of getting closure. Or maybe payback for a lifetime of various troubles?

In any case, it's still a mother and that's just a bad thing when you screw somebody in death.

I have no problem "screwing over" the dead to help the living.

Just because you're a parent doesn't entitle you to respect. My grandfather on my father's side was like this. Alcoholic, grandma left him, then made my dad move out at 14yrs old, more crap than I care to mention. Anyways just an abusive uncaring POS person. We severed all ties, but he would somehow "find out and show up" at occaisional weddings, drunk, screaming, abusive, lewd comments about the bridesmaids, etc. So glad my dad didn't end up that way. Anyways, before he was escorted out by my father and uncles, his line always was "I'm your father I deserve some respect" and my father's line always was "respect is earned not inherited". Anyways he passed away very young and there was no service, no recognition, no one cared. But there was one thing that stuck with me. I was a teenager at the time, that was over 20 years ago. But my dad made a point to tell me and my brothers that he had passed away and why they were doing what they were doing/not doing. But I recall my father's words like it was yesterday. He said "If I EVER behave like that, I'm saying it now, have more courage than me, and just kick my ass, all 3 of you". And he meant it. Also, a reason why I'm real careful with alcohol. I think it probably skipped a generation though because I never really feel an urge to get drunk. Maybe once year the wife will have to drive cause I had a bit too much. A rare prime rib steak though? We'll red meat is definitely my weakness and I have to regulate it's intake. Weird eh?

But I'm really impressed with the family doing something like this. Not only are they getting some closure and saying their peace, but they are also teaching a valuable lesson to their family. And that lesson is "don't be POS in life or no one will respect you in death". And I truly do respect that. People shouldn't just have to tolerate you because of genetics. And by taking a stand against this behavior, they will ensure that it doesn't carry on to another generation. Too often the siblings see the parents and follow their example. Part of breaking the chain is recognizing this and talking about it. The less skeletons in the closet the better.

[bbennett]

Maybe this is just their way of getting closure. Or maybe payback for a lifetime of various troubles?

In any case, it's still a mother and that's just a bad thing when you screw somebody in death.

I have no problem "screwing over" the dead to help the living.

Just because you're a parent doesn't entitle you to respect. My grandfather on my father's side was like this. Alcoholic, grandma left him, then made my dad move out at 14yrs old, more crap than I care to mention. Anyways just an abusive uncaring POS person. We severed all ties, but he would somehow "find out and show up" at occaisional weddings, drunk, screaming, abusive, lewd comments about the bridesmaids, etc. So glad my dad didn't end up that way. Anyways, before he was escorted out by my father and uncles, his line always was "I'm your father I deserve some respect" and my father's line always was "respect is earned not inherited". Anyways he passed away very young and there was no service, no recognition, no one cared. But there was one thing that stuck with me. I was a teenager at the time, that was over 20 years ago. But my dad made a point to tell me and my brothers that he had passed away and why they were doing what they were doing/not doing. But I recall my father's words like it was yesterday. He said "If I EVER behave like that, I'm saying it now, have more courage than me, and just kick my ass, all 3 of you". And he meant it.

But I'm really impressed with the family doing something like this. Not only are they getting some closure and saying their peace, but they are also teaching a valuable lesson to their family. And that lesson is "don't be POS in life or no one will respect you in death". And I truly do respect that. People shouldn't just have to tolerate you because of genetics. And by taking a stand against this behavior, they will ensure that it doesn't carry on to another generation. Too often the siblings see the parents and follow their example. Part of breaking the chain is recognizing this and talking about it. The less skeletons in the closet the better.

Very well said

[tallsteve]

Amen, deathcricket. My grandfather, my mother's father, was like that. My mother has horror story after horror story about her father- physical and mental abuse, drunkeness, etc. I remember as a mischievous teenager, hunting for and finding mini-bottles hidden in his garage. We never drank any, we would just hide them somewhere else so he would have a harder time finding them! My grandfather was a rough-and tumble cowboy. He looked and acted like John Wayne. Hard fightin', hard drinking. To his great credit, when my oldest cousin decided to go on a church mission, my grandfather totally and completely changed his life. He gave up alcohol cold-turkey and never had another drop so that he could go to the temple with my cousin and consequently with the rest of his grandkids as they became that age. He became a very caring, loving father and grandfather and remained such until his death and a finer man I know not. I guess my point is that his kids, my mother her sister and brothers made a pact when they were young that the abuse would end with him- and it did.

[devo_stevo]

That's a great story tallsteve. I have to admire those who can make such a drastic change in their lives. It takes a lot of courage and for that they deserve respect.

[Last Child]

Maybe this is just their way of getting closure. Or maybe payback for a lifetime of various troubles?

In any case, it's still a mother and that's just a bad thing when you screw somebody in death.

I have no problem "screwing over" the dead to help the living.

Just because you're a parent doesn't entitle you to respect. My grandfather on my father's side was like this. Alcoholic, grandma left him, then made my dad move out at 14yrs old, more crap than I care to mention. Anyways just an abusive uncaring POS person. We severed all ties, but he would somehow "find out and show up" at occaisional weddings, drunk, screaming, abusive, lewd comments about the bridesmaids, etc. So glad my dad didn't end up that way. Anyways, before he was escorted out by my father and uncles, his line always was "I'm your father I deserve some respect" and my father's line always was "respect is earned not inherited". Anyways he passed away very young and there was no service, no recognition, no one cared. But there was one thing that stuck with me. I was a teenager at the time, that was over 20 years ago. But my dad made a point to tell me and my brothers that he had passed away and why they were doing what they were doing/not doing. But I recall my father's words like it was yesterday. He said "If I EVER behave like that, I'm saying it now, have more courage than me, and just kick my ass, all 3 of you". And he meant it.

But I'm really impressed with the family doing something like this. Not only are they getting some closure and saying their peace, but they are also teaching a valuable lesson to their family. And that lesson is "don't be POS in life or no one will respect you in death". And I truly do respect that. People shouldn't just have to tolerate you because of genetics. And by taking a stand against this behavior, they will ensure that it doesn't carry on to another generation. Too often the siblings see the parents and follow their example. Part of breaking the chain is recognizing this and talking about it. The less skeletons in the closet the better.

Very well said

+1

Just because you are a mother or father doesn't automatically entitle you to a certain level of grandioseness. It is by your actions that you obtain the respect and love of others. Family or not.

[erial]

Obitchuary?

[Last Child]

Obitchuary?

Ahhh, good one.

[abirken]

Obitchuary?

Could not have been said ANY BETTER.
WORD!