Women's Key Words And What They Really Mean

[accadacca]

FINE: This is the word we use at the end of any argument that we
feel we are right about but need to shut you up. NEVER use fine
to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have one
of those arguments.

FIVE MINUTES: This is a half an hour. It is equivalent to the
five minutes that your football game is going to last before you
take out the trash, so I feel that it's an even trade.

NOTHING: This means something and you should be on your toes.
"Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of
wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards.
"Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five
Minutes" and end with the word "Fine."

GO AHEAD (with raised eyebrows): This is a dare. One that will
result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with
the word "Fine."

GO AHEAD (with normal eyebrows): This means "I give up" or "do
what you want because I don't care." You will get a raised
eyebrow "Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing"
and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when
she cools off.

LOUD SIGH: This is not actually a word, but is still often a
verbal statement very misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means
she thinks you are an idiot at that moment and wonders why she
is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over
"Nothing."

SOFT SIGH: Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft
Sighs" are one of the few things that some men actually
understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not move or
breathe and she will stay content.

THAT'S OKAY: This is one of the most dangerous statements a
woman can say to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to
think long and hard before paying you retributions for whatever
it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the
word "Fine" and used in conjunction with a raised eyebrow "Go
Ahead." At some point in the near future when she has plotted
and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.

PLEASE DO: This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is
giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason
you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a
fair chance to tell the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't
get a "That's Okay."

THANKS: A woman is thanking you. Do not faint; just say you're
welcome.

THANKS A LOT: This is much different from 'THANKS." A woman will
say, "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It
signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way, and will
be followed by the "Loud Sigh." Be care not to ask what is wrong
after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only tell you "Oh Nothing."