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Thread: Alcohol Side Effects

  1. #1

    Alcohol Side Effects

    1. Symptom: Cold and humid feet.
    Cause: Glass is being held at incorrect angle.
    Cure: Maneuver glass until open end is facing upward.

    2. Symptom: Warm and humid feet.
    Cause: You pissed your pants.
    Cure: Dry yourself at nearest restroom.

    3. Symptom: The wall facing you is full of lights.
    Cause: You're lying on the floor.
    Cure: Position your body at a 90-degree angle to the floor.

    4. Symptom: The floor looks blurry.
    Cause: You're looking through an empty glass.
    Cure: Quickly refill with your favorite beverage.

    5. Symptom: The floor is moving.
    Cause: You're being dragged away.
    Cure: At least ask where they're taking you.

    6. Symptom: You see multiple reflections of your face.
    Cause: You're trying to puke in the toilet.
    Cure: Stick your finger in your mouth.

    7. Symptom: You hear echoes every time someone speaks.
    Cause: You have your glass on your ear.
    Cure: Stop making an ass of yourself.

    8. Symptom: The room is shaking a lot, everyone is dressed in white and the music is very repetitive.
    Cause: You're in an ambulance.
    Cure: Don't move. Let the professionals do their job.

    9. Symptom: Your dad and all your brothers are looking at you funny.
    Cause: You're in the wrong house.
    Cure: Ask if they can point you to your house.

    10. Symptom: A huge light is blinding you.
    Cause: You woke up in someone's lawn.
    Cure: Coffee and a long nap.

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