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Thread: BYU Jokes

  1. #1
    Bogley Badass accadacca's Avatar
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    BYU Jokes

    DON'T FORGET THE TIP - Q: How do you get a BYU grad off your front porch?

    A: Pay him for the pizza.

    THAT SMARTS - Q: What do you call an intelligent person in Cougar Stadium?

    A: A visitor.

    DEGREE TO GO - The engineer who graduated from Utah State asks, "How does that work?''

    The engineer who graduated from the U. of U asks, "How can I make that work better?''

    BIG G, LITTLE O - Q: What is the difference between the U. of U. football team and a bowl of Cheerios?

    A: The Cheerios belong in a bowl!

    GROUNDHOG DAY - Q: What do you get when you cross-breed BYU football and a groundhog?

    A: Six more weeks of bad football!




    The engineer who graduated from BYU asks, "Would you like fries with that?''

    OH-OH ORSON - It's a good thing that Orson Pratt was not made president of the LDS Church. Otherwise BYU would have been named OPU.

    LIGHT U. UP - Q. How many BYU graduates does it take to change a light bulb?

    A. Answer unknown. Still searching for a BYU graduate with the qualifications to do such a task.

    LEARNING CURVE - Q: How many BYU freshmen does it take to change a light bulb?

    A: None, it's a sophomore course.

    CURSES! SOILED AGAIN - Q: Why did the BYU grad only change her baby's diaper once a week?

    A: The box said 9 to 11 lbs.

    FORE U. - Q: What do you call someone from BYU golfing with an IQ of 120?

    A: A foursome!

    BOOK 'EM - A fire gutted the BYU library the other day causing $6.95 worth of damage . . . It could have been worse but someone had the coloring book checked out.

    ON TRACK - As two BYU grads walked through the countryside, they noticed some tracks. The first asked, ``Deer tracks?'' The second replied, ``No, bear tracks.'' However, the conversation ended abruptly when a train hit them.

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  3. #2
    You missed my favorite:

    A child stood before a judge in a heated custody case. The judged told him "Son, you need to choose who you are going to live with. Do you want to live with your mother? " The child replies "No, she beats me. " The judge says, "Well then I assume you want to live with your father." The child replies "No way, he beats me too." "Well then who will you live with?" asks the judge.
    "I want to live with BYU. They don't beat anyone!"

    Doh! Oh wait I attend BYU, I guess the joke doesn't really apply to any other colleges in this state though. Good thing I'm not a sports fan.

    Heres a jewel I'm sure no ones ever heard before:

    Why was there no manger scene at the U this year? ....
    Because they could find three wise men or a virgin!


    By the way.... they really wanted me to attend your little college up there in SLC but it I decided I would rather get a real education ;)

  4. #3
    Bogley Badass accadacca's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rock_ski_cowboy
    Heres a jewel I'm sure no ones ever heard before:

    Why was there no manger scene at the U this year? ....
    Because they could find three wise men or a virgen!
    Looking at your spelling and grammar in this sentence, you may want to up your degree to the 8-year plan at the college down south.
    There could be some sort of joke made about the BYU student that couldn’t spell virgin.

    All in fun rock!

  5. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by accadacca
    There could be some sort of joke made about the BYU student that couldn’t spell virgin.
    Hmmm that does have some good joke potential... let me know when you think of one.

    Dohg! I misspelt that werd last time i rote that joke on the intarnet two... I guess no madder how good of an edukashun i get i'll never overcome my "spanish fark" roots I'm sure yuove nevar misspelt any wrods be4

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