I Miss My Wife

[DiscGo]

My wife is back in Ohio for two weeks (one to go) and I am discovering how inept I have become without her. I was bored last night and missing her so I went to bed before 10pm. I called her and explained my situation and she warned me not to go to sleep knowing that I would be up at 1am if I went to bed before midnight. Sure enough it is now 2:30 and I have been up for close to 2 hours. I can't sleep and find myself realizing how dependent I have become on her.



There is nothing "uncool" about being married but I used to be independently much cooler than I am now. How do these things happen? I feel homesick in my own home without her and my little boy. I finally have time to do more stuff and instead just find myself wanting these two weeks to be over (which is highly unlike me).

[denaliguide]

disco, amigo if you show any more of your sensitive side i think i will :puke8: . :cry1: me a river. quit :wallbash: and man up. we know you just miss the :giveit: . its only another week until you can :party: . so get off your :bootyshake: and go have some fun while you can. :haha: :haha:

[rockgremlin]

Here's a list of stuff to keep you occupied till wifey returns:


1. PAY...PER...VIEW.
2. Northern Exposure
3. American Bush
4. Trails
5. Bitch beer
6. Real beer
7. Holiday Gun Club
8. Doug's Shoot n' Sports
9. Lumpy's Sports Bar
10. Port O' Call (better hurry b4 they get shut down)


This should get you started. :popcorn:

[JP]

Invite some friends over :haha:

[DiscGo]

What do you guys do when you can't sleep? I was up from 1 to 5 this morning and I tried everything. I find myself now exhausted with a full day ahead of me.



I usually make up stories in my mind or watch TV until I fall asleep. Both of those failed me last night.

[Alex]

There is always a "Rosie" waiting for you :lol8:

In all seriousness, I share your feelings bro. When my wife leaves, I jump for joy for exactly 1.5 days, then I get all depressed and wish for her to come back.

Don't sit on your ass and feel sorry for yourself. Keep yourself occupied, I am sure there are repairs on the house needs to be done, cleaning, laundry. Go shopping for something for the house. Make some cool surprise for when your wife and a boy come back. Fix the car/change oil. Pay the bills. Clean the garage, go to the gym. You got to keep your mind occupied.

[BruteForce]

What do you guys do when you can't sleep? I was up from 1 to 5 this morning and I tried everything. I find myself now exhausted with a full day ahead of me.



I usually make up stories in my mind or watch TV until I fall asleep. Both of those failed me last night.

I turn the TV on, but don't watch. The sound usually is enough to make me go back to sleep. Usually put it on the news.

As for your wife being gone, I know your feeling. My wife is easily my best friend and I can't bear to be apart with her very long. When I was in the military, I'd be gone for weeks and months and the separation was easily the most difficult thing I've dealt with.

I don't mind a few days if I have activities already planned out (camping with the boys, etc) - but if you're just sitting around the house, it's terrible.

Get out and do something, it will make it easier to handle.

[R]

I agree with everyone else - Abby and I miss each other tons when one of us is gone. We call each other a lot, just to hear each other's voices.

As far as sleep is concerned, don't be too concerned. You won't go blind or insane. A good strategy might be to make time for a really vigorous workout earlier in the day, such that you are completely exhausted. Since some of the times Abby and I are apart is when I am hiking, I can usually sleep because I've been hiking hard all day.

[Rev. Coyote]

Smoke a doobie and read some Camus. You'll drift right off and dream pleasant things.

Unless you've got some Demerol...

[FROGGER]

I must be a terrible husband, I love it when mine is gone, all the extra real estate in bed is worth is alone... :ne_nau:

[Last Child]

Smoke a doobie. You'll drift right off and dream pleasant things.

:toker: Ahhhhhh, that's what I'm talkin 'bout

[FROGGER]

I must be a terrible husband, I love it when mine is gone, all the extra real estate in bed is worth it alone... :ne_nau:

[DirkHammergate]

I usually only date chicks that are married or involved... they're much more interesting.

You might ask yourself, how does this apply to DiscGo's sadness about his wife being gone for two weeks?

The Answer?






























It doesn't.

[tanya]

What do you guys do when you can't sleep? I was up from 1 to 5 this morning and I tried everything. I find myself now exhausted with a full day ahead of me.



I usually make up stories in my mind or watch TV until I fall asleep. Both of those failed me last night.


Call for a masseuse to come to your house tonight. She will help you get to sleep. :haha:

[Scott Card]

These people are all going to get you in trouble....

Do you speak Spanish? If not, find a Spanish channel, close your eyes and soon, you will be in la la land.

Also, infomercials seem to bore me to sleep. However, in your current state of mind, stay away from the "enhancement" and dating infomercials. Those would be bad. Look for a good Wing ladder commercial. Something manly. Which leads me to my real question.

Dude, why are you admitting all of this. I think you need to sign up for my Man Class. There is surely a man rule you have breached here. :haha:

[Rev. Coyote]

Hey, it takes a man to admit what Dan is admitting here.

Plus, it's kinda sweet....

[devo_stevo]

Sounds like he needs to take some classes down at the "Rex-Kwan-Do". There he can learn the "wisdom of a man" and put his wife in a killer headlock when she gets home. :naughty:

[rockgremlin]

Sounds like he needs to take some classes down at the "Rex-Kwan-Do". There he can learn the "wisdom of a man" and put his wife in a killer headlock when she gets home. :naughty:


:roflol:



Dude, your wife says hi....


:lol8:

[nelsonccc]

I miss your wife too. :naughty:

[KapitanSparrow]

I miss your wife too. :naughty: :naughty: :roflol:

[Kent K25]

I must be a terrible husband, I love it when mine is gone, all the extra real estate in bed is worth is alone... :ne_nau:

I don't think your wife would like you commenting on how much empty real estate she leaves open for you with her absence. :nono:

[accadacca]

Here's a list of stuff to keep you occupied till wifey returns:


1. PAY...PER...VIEW.
2. Northern Exposure
3. American Bush
4. Trails
5. Bitch beer
6. Real beer
7. Holiday Gun Club
8. Doug's Shoot n' Sports
9. Lumpy's Sports Bar
10. Port O' Call (better hurry b4 they get shut down)


This should get you started. :popcorn:
:roflol:

[Scott Card]

Hey, it takes a man to admit what Dan is admitting here.

Plus, it's kinda sweet.... Sweet? My class is filling fast. :lol8:

[Randi]

My wife is back in Ohio for two weeks (one to go) and I am discovering how inept I have become without her. I was bored last night and missing her so I went to bed before 10pm. I called her and explained my situation and she warned me not to go to sleep knowing that I would be up at 1am if I went to bed before midnight. Sure enough it is now 2:30 and I have been up for close to 2 hours. I can't sleep and find myself realizing how dependent I have become on her.



There is nothing "uncool" about being married but I used to be independently much cooler than I am now. How do these things happen? I feel homesick in my own home without her and my little boy. I finally have time to do more stuff and instead just find myself wanting these two weeks to be over (which is highly unlike me).

You could go on http://www.epicurious.com/recipesmenus/
and practice cooking. You could learn to make your wife an exotic dish or two, and make her a wonderful meal when she returns.

You could create something beautiful and meaningful for her; write her a letter perhaps, and fill it with prose of your tender feelings, and written witness of some of wonderful memories you

[nelsonccc]

posted twice

[nelsonccc]

You could go on http://www.epicurious.com/recipesmenus/
and practice cooking. You could learn to make your wife an exotic dish or two, and make her a wonderful meal when she returns.

GAY

[quote]You could create something beautiful and meaningful for her; write her a letter perhaps, and fill it with prose of your tender feelings, and written witness of some of wonderful memories you

[DiscGo]

Man up. If you do any of this she'll be spending a lot more time at my place. A woman needs a real man, not some sissy gay guy.


Let me just say that most of your answers have all brought smiles to my face. Thanks guys.

[BruteForce]

[quote] You could go on http://www.epicurious.com/recipesmenus/
and practice cooking. You could learn to make your wife an exotic dish or two, and make her a wonderful meal when she returns.

GAY

[quote]You could create something beautiful and meaningful for her; write her a letter perhaps, and fill it with prose of your tender feelings, and written witness of some of wonderful memories you

[abirken]

I think I would stroke out at an early age if my husband ever did any of the above mentioned suggestions. I'm a deprived romantical woman. :cry1:
:lol8:

So Discgo.....do the right thing man. :2thumbs: I have faith in you.

[nelsonccc]

[quote=nelsonccc][quote] You could go on http://www.epicurious.com/recipesmenus/
and practice cooking. You could learn to make your wife an exotic dish or two, and make her a wonderful meal when she returns.

GAY

[quote]You could create something beautiful and meaningful for her; write her a letter perhaps, and fill it with prose of your tender feelings, and written witness of some of wonderful memories you

[tanya]

Those of you who know me probably saw the sarcasm. I guess I can agree that a little love here and there is okay. I suggest that rather then write love letters, you should go down to the local adult store and buy a new leopard print banana hammock. Then when she comes home, let her find you laying on the bed with that thing on. Now That says LOVE.


Oh yeah Baby! My kind of man. :naughty:


PS... DiscGo....

To keep yourself busy --- It's always nice to come home to a freshly painted and clean house or some other home project that was completed while I was away.

[Scott Card]

[quote=BruteForce][quote=nelsonccc][quote] You could go on http://www.epicurious.com/recipesmenus/
and practice cooking. You could learn to make your wife an exotic dish or two, and make her a wonderful meal when she returns.

GAY

[quote]You could create something beautiful and meaningful for her; write her a letter perhaps, and fill it with prose of your tender feelings, and written witness of some of wonderful memories you

[nelsonccc]

Disco is man or very nearly one.

Oh no you didn't. Very nearly a man. Almost, but not quite.

Weiner hammock gets it done day in and day out. Hell you could combine the painting suggestion and the hammock idea. Kinky. Woman are simple creatures, dedicated to providing and taking care of our every need. Just tell them they loook pretty every once and a while and you're set.

[accadacca]

You could watch some old episodes of the man show on YouTube. Now those guys know how to treat a lady... :lol8:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b8NwzkvGLK0

[Cirrus2000]

Forget the bananammock.

Tongue exercises. :nod: Nuff said.


Say...
Did anybody else spot:



DIRK!?!?

[RedMan]

If it helps...I miss your wife too. :roflol:

[greyhair biker]

1. It's good to miss your wife.
2. It's aparently not good for you to be home alone.
3. Clean the house from top to bottom. Do it right when you get home from work.
THEN
4. Go for a hard workout. Run your ass off...for 40 minutes, then hit the weights hard for an hour.
5. grab a bite.
6. Go to bed. You're now exhausted :lol8:

[Ih8grvty]

I suggest that rather then write love letters, you should go down to the local adult store and buy a new leopard print banana hammock. Then when she comes home, let her find you laying on the bed with that thing on. Now That says LOVE.

I think, based on my own experience, this isa bad idea.
Iv done the red ribbon around the enraged weenie, struck a pose naked on the bed, picked her up at the airport nude ( I was wearing shorts and a tank top in the park and wait, I slipped em off when she called from the pick up lane and told me what number she was nearest) I have wrapped up a box, cut a hole in it and plopped my junk through it so she could pull off the top and see the prize, none of this has ever gone over well, not a single time, not a single attempt, all of them failed.
I get blank stares or "WTF is wrong with you?!" sometimes an eye roll and a "do you ever think of anything else?" sometimes even a long long evening starter like "is that all I am to you is for sex?"

Disco, do that gay shit, let me know how it works out cause the next time my wife is heading out for a week or two away, I am not pulling my usual on her return, or for valentines day next month, so test it, let me know how it goes over, your experiment could just save my bacon in the coming years of my marriage.
For the record, if she is flying in, do not hint at road head on the drive home after picking her up, apparently jet lag kills all desire for anything of any sexual nature and a greedy act like that, kills it for a few days after her return as well, I speak from experience, trust me on this, I speak the truth brother!

[blueeyes]

OMG...

Bitch beer, "Rosie", doobies, man rules, wife in headlock, scrapbooking (a man :ne_nau: ), banana hammock :lol8: , tongue excercises :naughty:, junk in a box??? :roll: , road head!

You guys are killing me!! :lol8: :lol8: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :lol8:

This has to be the best thread in a long time.

Discgo buy her two dozen roses, pick one honey do off her list and have it completed. Give her a big romanitc kiss when she walks out of the airport and a lingering hug. Tell her how much you have missed her.

Bring her home and show her this thread. She will thank you for the things you didn't do... think it incredibly sweet all of the nice suggestions and probably laugh her head off.

Who the hell is Dirk?

























oh and those tongue excercises :nod:

[abirken]

OMG...
oh and those tongue excercises :nod:

:eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :hail2thechief: :hail2thechief: :hail2thechief: :hail2thechief:

[Sombeech]

Who the hell is Dirk?



:haha:

Sounds like you need a proper introduction

[abirken]

Who the hell is Dirk?



:haha:

Sounds like you need a proper introduction

Include me in this intro b/c I have no idea who Dirk is??? :ne_nau:

[Sombeech]

Dirk? Dirk Hammergate? The Hammer?

Oh man, I guess he's been gone for a while. We need to make sure he sticks around for a little bit.

He's on the first page of this thread.

[abirken]

Dirk? Dirk Hammergate? The Hammer?

Oh man, I guess he's been gone for a while. We need to make sure he sticks around for a little bit.

He's on the first page of this thread.



Ahhh the Hammergate. Ok now I'm back on the right page. :lol8:

[RedMan]

I see a rubbish bin in this threads future....

[DirkHammergate]

Dirk? Dirk Hammergate? The Hammer?

Oh man, I guess he's been gone for a while. We need to make sure he sticks around for a little bit.

He's on the first page of this thread.



Ahhh the Hammergate. Ok now I'm back on the right page. :lol8:

Jesus, I leave this place for a rap career and nobody remembers me?

I'm gonna go P'Diddy on all your asses! Well, maybe just Allison's.

[DirkHammergate]

And this "I miss my wife" thread as to be the most pathetic thread I've ever seen. I like DiscGo and I get the fact that he's missing his women and kid but the rest of this nonsense... pathetic.

It's time we started talking about my favorite subject again.

Me and Chicks.

[DirkHammergate]

It's time we started talking about my favorite subject again.

Me and Chicks.

And my 2nd favorite topic, Dirk talking in the 3rd person.

[stefan]

It's time we started talking about my favorite subject again.

Me and Chicks.

And my 2nd favorite topic, Dirk talking in the 3rd person.

These are Jimmy's training shoes. Oh yeah! Jimmy couldn't jump at all before he got these. Jimmy was like you

[1Aussie]

My wife is back in Ohio for two weeks (one to go) and I am discovering how inept I have become without her. I was bored last night and missing her so I went to bed before 10pm. I called her and explained my situation and she warned me not to go to sleep knowing that I would be up at 1am if I went to bed before midnight. Sure enough it is now 2:30 and I have been up for close to 2 hours. I can't sleep and find myself realizing how dependent I have become on her.



There is nothing "uncool" about being married but I used to be independently much cooler than I am now. How do these things happen? I feel homesick in my own home without her and my little boy. I finally have time to do more stuff and instead just find myself wanting these two weeks to be over (which is highly unlike me).
DiscGo you are a really nice guy, she is very lucky but I am sure she knows that already :nod:

[tanya]

I can't believe they actually asked who is DIRK!!!!!

:eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2:


NOOBS!!!! :roll:

[Jaxx]

dick in a box is the way to go. She gets to open a present and you also get a present. Sweet and kinky mixed into one. Let me know how it goes if you use this because I was thinking about doing it for Valentines.

Seriously though. Make dinner for her, clean the house, get her some roses with a card and write a short "I love you and appreciate all you do for me" note on it. The banana hammock will follow if you play your cards right. Show her that you appreciate all she does for your family.

She will like that more than skimpy underwear. Plus guys shouldn't wear banana hammocks, its a little on the gay side. Next thing will be wearing pasties and doing a strip tease for her. Naked or clothed that is man rule #117.

[Jaxx]

Sorry forgot the video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WhwbxEfy7fg

[blueeyes]

I can't believe they actually asked who is DIRK!!!!!

:eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2:


NOOBS!!!! :roll:

I can't know everything... these alter ego's are bizare to say the least.

Intresting game you all play here. :popcorn:

And that is what I ment by Who the hell is Dirk? :lol8:

[DirkHammergate]

I can't believe they actually asked who is DIRK!!!!!

:eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2:


NOOBS!!!! :roll:

I spend a year in Thailand without Internet access and the neighborhood goes to Hell. It's a shame really...

Hi Darling, you look wonderful.

xoxo

Dirk

[abirken]

I can't believe they actually asked who is DIRK!!!!!

:eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2:


NOOBS!!!! :roll:

Whatever I'm not a Noob Tanya. :roll:

[abirken]

I can't believe they actually asked who is DIRK!!!!!

:eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2:


NOOBS!!!! :roll:

I can't know everything... these alter ego's are bizare to say the least.

Intresting game you all play here. :popcorn:

And that is what I ment by Who the hell is Dirk? :lol8:

I agree. :2thumbs:

[tanya]

I spend a year in Thailand without Internet access and the neighborhood goes to Hell. It's a shame really...

Hi Darling, you look wonderful.

xoxo


Dirk

Hello yourself Darlin'

Do we get to see a recent shot of you? I have missed you. :naughty:

[DirkHammergate]

I'll see what I can dig up...

[tanya]

I can't believe they actually asked who is DIRK!!!!!

:eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2:


NOOBS!!!! :roll:

I can't know everything... these alter ego's are bizare to say the least.

Intresting game you all play here. :popcorn:

And that is what I ment by Who the hell is Dirk? :lol8:

He is a FUN character! :lol8: Enjoy :five:

[savanna3313]

What do you guys do when you can't sleep?

I log in and read the Bogley posts........

:lol8:

[savanna3313]

I can't believe they actually asked who is DIRK!!!!!

:eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2:


NOOBS!!!! :roll:

I can't know everything... these alter ego's are bizare to say the least.

Intresting game you all play here. :popcorn:

And that is what I ment by Who the hell is Dirk? :lol8:

He is a FUN character! :lol8: Enjoy :five:


OMG! The Hammer has returned! :2thumbs: Somebody said you were dead! :eek2:

:haha:

Welcome back darlin'. :nomystery:

[DiscGo]

What do you guys do when you can't sleep?

I log in and read the Bogley posts........

:lol8:


:haha:

[DirkHammergate]

I can't believe they actually asked who is DIRK!!!!!

:eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2:


NOOBS!!!! :roll:

I can't know everything... these alter ego's are bizare to say the least.

Intresting game you all play here. :popcorn:

And that is what I ment by Who the hell is Dirk? :lol8:

He is a FUN character! :lol8: Enjoy :five:


OMG! The Hammer has returned! :2thumbs: Somebody said you were dead! :eek2:

:haha:

Welcome back darlin'. :nomystery:

Not sure I'm back and not sure I want to be Dirk. Secretly I've started a Rap label and am working on my first album with Sean Combs. No handle yet... I'm still working my grove.

caio, bitches!