The Seductress

[tanya]

This looks like a fun book to buy!

The author of a new book says if women want to seduce powerful men, their best weapon is brains, not boobs.

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/5184Y0RSA6L._SS500_.jpg

By Salon:

What are the morals of seduction?

It's a stereotype that the seductress is a sly, devious, vampy, low-rent Cosmo girl who uses all these disingenuous tricks to get her way. It's not like that. There isn't anything immoral about charm. I know feminists say, "Charm is a four-letter word." But if you go back to the Greeks, charm is really as sophisticated as haute cuisine.

But what about Monica Lewinsky? How charming could she be, snapping her thong?

A seductress is a person who is the complete opposite of Monica Lewinsky. A person who is in complete control of her love life, who is able to captivate, and keep captivated, the top guys. Bill Clinton was not in love with Monica Lewinsky. We're talking about love. We're talking inspiring and sustaining passion. That's what the seductress does. A seductress doesn't just get a guy to drop his trousers. That is so simple, you know. [Pause.] When a guy seduces a woman, what does it mean? It means he takes her off to bed. A woman who seduces a man makes this guy fall desperately in love with her -- for life if she wants.

Let's talk about power. Men have the power and the seductress gets some of that power.

Reflected glory.

So say you were Margaret Thatcher back in the '80s. Who was she going to seduce? She had the power. She only wants romance, right?

I have a whole chapter on the "Machtweiber." That's a word that has no translation in English. It's German for a female political leader who is incredibly sexy. This kind of woman wants to have it all. Catherine the Great was a premier example. Curious thing about Catherine the Great is, she used what I call an eroticized M.O. to rule the country. There's a lot of bad press about Catherine the Great. All that stuff about the horse. And none of that is true. That was all cooked up by a French gossip columnist who hung around the court, and she rejected his advances, and he took revenge by making up all those stories about the horses and the heart-shaped hoofs. His male pride was wounded, but he really did love this woman. You can understand why when you read about her. She was adorable. She was multifaceted in so many ways. She wrote dozens of plays and comedies. Her big boast was, "No one has ever been in my company for longer than 15 minutes without feeling completely at ease." She ego-massaged the country into doing things her way.

The irony is that she didn't bother to seduce the gossip columnist...

He was small potatoes. She was interested in more interesting men. The big, powerful guys.

But in terms of her legacy, to this day when you think about Catherine the Great, you imagine her being ****ed by a horse.

People don't want to see a woman with excessive power. It dismantles the male hierarchy. It makes it difficult to see a woman with that kind of power, especially if it is sexual and erotic. It's one thing to have a woman in power if she's desexed --

Margaret Thatcher. Golda Meir.

We really have that problem in this country. Jackie Kennedy said there are two kinds of women: women with power in bed, and women with power in the world.


Marriage dull?

One of the reasons I wrote this book is to answer the question, "Why should marriages get so dull?" Why should there be this "bliss dip," they call it, after two years now? They used to call it the seven-year itch. It's called the ramp effect. It's like a drug. You need stronger and stronger doses. This is what the art of love is all about. Inspiring -- but mostly sustaining -- passion. Or keeping love. Not so much attracting love -- that's easy to do. But the art of keeping things interesting. The art of keeping someone on high flame. That was the test. The marriages in my book are interesting. If a woman got her dream guy it's interesting to watch how she kept him at her feet -- maybe that's not the right word -- how she kept him totally fascinated and mesmerized in love.

Minette Helvetius is a perfect example of that. She marries the hottest honey in France. This man had three women a day. He had his wake-up girl. His lunchtime girl. And then in the evening he had the most famous actress of the day. He was this gorgeous guy who spoke many languages, and he dueled, and he was some sort of superhero. Minette captured him for life, and he never looked to the left or to the right. She kept him totally enchanted.

Was she totally enchanted with him?

Yes. It was a perfect love match. It's equally true that some of the women in my book, like Martha Gellhorn, were easily bored with the alpha man that they would pick. I had to set the bar high so I didn't pick any women who were dumped. Or if they were, it was very seldom. You can't have a perfect track record. I chose women who were almost always successful.

Is monogamy biological or psychological?

No one has ever bothered to study the real successful women. There's a lot of speculation about this, that and the other thing in the same way that Bernie Siegel was the first person to study healthy patients who survived cancer. Before, they'd only studied the sick ones, never the survivors. The same with these women. No one has bothered to actually sit down and study the women who were consistently successful in their love lives. What you read about them is, if you find the right guy, the perfect person, I can't imagine why you wouldn't be monogamous. If you're both growing and are crazy about each other, and use these arts of seduction on a daily basis, why would you go to anyone else?

[rockgremlin]

Margaret Thatcher on a cold day!! Margaret Thatcher on a cold day!! :lol8:


Brains are no good if the woman is seriously overweight and dog ugly.

However, even the dumbest hot blonde in the world will always be popular with the guys.

[tanya]

Margaret Thatcher on a cold day!! Margaret Thatcher on a cold day!! :lol8:


Brains are no good if the woman is seriously overweight and dog ugly.

However, even the dumbest hot blond in the world will always be popular with the guys.

Really? Then to you it's all about looks. What if a woman fascinates you but her face is rather unattractive and she is a little overweight but as a friend you find yourself wanting to spend all your time with her because she is fun, interesting, adores you ....

And the dumb blond... only cares about herself, how she looks and is boring.

You would ask out the dumb blond or the one you enjoy being with more?

Or do you keep the one as a friend and hit the other one for sex. :mrgreen:

[DaveOU812]

For me it's all about the happy medium. She doesn't have to be drop dead gorgeous but needs to be attractive. No need for the rocket scientist but needs to be able to hold an intellectual conversation. Brains and beauty are only two small parts of the equation though. There is humor, the ability to have fun, common interests, and so many others. There isn't just one thing that blows the others out of the water. It's more of an over all for me.

[rockgremlin]

Really? Then to you it's all about looks. What if a woman fascinates you but her face is rather unattractive and she is a little overweight but as a friend you find yourself wanting to spend all your time with her because she is fun, interesting, adores you ....

And the dumb blond... only cares about herself, how she looks and is boring.

You would ask out the dumb blond or the one you enjoy being with more?

Or do you keep the one as a friend and hit the other one for sex. :mrgreen:

I was merely making an observation. My personal stance was left out of that post, and is quite similar to Dave's. I had a female friend in high school that was overweight and not really attractive, but i chose to hang out with her all of the time because I felt at ease with her, and she was fun to be around. I would never have pursued that to higher level mostly because I regarded her as more of a sister than a love interest.

[trackrunner]

Wow she's hot
Baroness Thatcher :naughty: :slobber: :knary:

http://www.freakingnews.com/pictures/1500/Margaret-Thatcher-1665.jpg

http://www.notsensibles.com/site/images/ns2a.gif

http://www.redmolotov.com/images/designs/thatcherrevolutionary_design.jpg

http://www.fortifyingthefamily.com/uploads/thatcher2.jpg

http://img.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2007/08_02/012THATCHER_468x577.jpg

[rockgremlin]

I love how she's flipping us all off in that first pic. :roflol:

[tanya]

I was merely making an observation. My personal stance was left out of that post, and is quite similar to Dave's. I had a female friend in high school that was overweight and not really attractive, but i chose to hang out with her all of the time because I felt at ease with her, and she was fun to be around. I would never have pursued that to higher level mostly because I regarded her as more of a sister than a love interest.

Would you ever have interest in this kind of woman as a love interest though?

and...


What happens if the woman you love and married and are stuck with for life gains 75 lbs, cuts off her hair and gets leather skin from so much sun time? Do you still love her and want sex with her?

[tanya]

For me it's all about the happy medium. She doesn't have to be drop dead gorgeous but needs to be attractive. No need for the rocket scientist but needs to be able to hold an intellectual conversation. Brains and beauty are only two small parts of the equation though. There is humor, the ability to have fun, common interests, and so many others. There isn't just one thing that blows the others out of the water. It's more of an over all for me.


Someone said on here quite a while ago.. 'Beech I think.... "Wives are not for sex" ---- It really does make sense that men want someone they are comfortable with ---- but then why do they spend so much time fantasizing and dreaming about knockouts? Women are attracted to powerful men (many not all of course) .... to me... a high IQ is powerful.... so its one of those things that is downright sexy.... You don't find that to be sexy in a woman?

I know I am an extremist though!!! I always seem to find someone that is extreme in one area --- moderate overall seems safe and good in the long run.

[Alex]

Knockouts are usually fun to look at .... and that's about it.

[tanya]

Knockouts are usually fun to look at .... and that's about it.



Models are Huge!!!! I wonder how many men would really want a woman so much taller than them?

[DirkHammergate]

Knockouts are usually fun to look at .... and that's about it.



Models are Huge!!!! I wonder how many men would really want a woman so much taller than them?

I love taller women, my ex is 5' 10" and I'm 5' 7", when we get together now she throws on 3 inch pumps to be a bitch, Dudes all over wink at me, like, that guy must have a huge *#!@.

I've done a couple small chicks, I just don't like them small.

[tanya]

Knockouts are usually fun to look at .... and that's about it.



Models are Huge!!!! I wonder how many men would really want a woman so much taller than them?

I love taller women, my ex is 5' 10" and I'm 5' 7", when we get together now she throws on 3 inch pumps to be a bitch, Dudes all over wink at me, like, that guy must have a huge *#!@.

I've done a couple small chicks, I just don't like them small.


That I would have never guessed. That tells me you are confident.... is that right guys?

[Jaxx]

That I would have never guessed. That tells me you are confident.... is that right guys?

na, it's just easier in the standing position.

[tanya]

That I would have never guessed. That tells me you are confident.... is that right guys?

na, it's just easier in the standing position.




:roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol:

[Alex]

Dirk != normal guys
Dirk = a smooooooth playa :cool2:

[DirkHammergate]

Knockouts are usually fun to look at .... and that's about it.



Models are Huge!!!! I wonder how many men would really want a woman so much taller than them?

I love taller women, my ex is 5' 10" and I'm 5' 7", when we get together now she throws on 3 inch pumps to be a bitch, Dudes all over wink at me, like, that guy must have a huge *#!@.

I've done a couple small chicks, I just don't like them small.


That I would have never guessed. That tells me you are confident.... is that right guys?

I guess so, let me just say I've gone full circle in the confidence area, i.e, having most of it ripped out by my Ex then me building it back up on my own, now that I've done it on my own I feel next to unstoppable but its been hard work. Like this morning I was helping a friend unpack and move, we've gone out a couple times but it was plainly obvious that we'd just be friends which is great cause I'm not into her that way but she is cute.

We were talking and chit chatting and I finally just said to her "I bet we have sex...." really casually. She's like "Uh ha. We aren't!" and I went on to elaborate the fact that I get what I want and I might feel like it eventually, just cause. She didn't put up much of a fit. I'm not saying its cause I'm off the chart handsome but mostly cause I believe it no matter how ridiculous it may seem and the confidence shows through. I'm very sneaky like that.

[tanya]

Knockouts are usually fun to look at .... and that's about it.



Models are Huge!!!! I wonder how many men would really want a woman so much taller than them?

I love taller women, my ex is 5' 10" and I'm 5' 7", when we get together now she throws on 3 inch pumps to be a bitch, Dudes all over wink at me, like, that guy must have a huge *#!@.

I've done a couple small chicks, I just don't like them small.


That I would have never guessed. That tells me you are confident.... is that right guys?

I guess so, let me just say I've gone full circle in the confidence area, i.e, having most of it ripped out by my Ex then me building it back up on my own, now that I've done it on my own I feel next to unstoppable but its been hard work. Like this morning I was helping a friend unpack and move, we've gone out a couple times but it was plainly obvious that we'd just be friends which is great cause I'm not into her that way but she is cute.

We were talking and chit chatting and I finally just said to her "I bet we have sex...." really casually. She's like "Uh ha. We aren't!" and I went on to elaborate the fact that I get what I want and I might feel like it eventually, just cause. She didn't put up much of a fit. I'm not saying its cause I'm off the chart handsome but mostly cause I believe it no matter how ridiculous it may seem and the confidence shows through. I'm very sneaky like that.

A man does not have to be off the chart handsome or confident .... he just has to make the woman feel as if she is special, beautiful. etc... (at least with me. I can't speak for all women since most seem very different from me.)

I do not care if a man looks like a model .. in fact I hate that look haha: -- but some looks are attractive to me and others are not. I love the young William Shanter look... even though I like much older men (he really went downhill though as he got older) ~sigh~

http://trekmovie.com/wp-content/uploads/poslash.JPG

Spocks does not turn me on... too tall, too skinny... not so passionate. :lol8:


And I would not say him exactly even when he was younger .. but that average look he had was great. Not too tall, not too short, nice body but not over the top -- manly shoulders and chest, and that sort of face. Not too heavy .. not too skinny --- just sort of average. Sort of like Jack in 24 --- but also its the characters they play. They are the powerful guys in the show that are passionate about their women and their jobs. That is attractive!!!!!

http://blogs.4bauer.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/24_605-sc555_068_f.jpg



I think most of us know from the first day if we want sex with a man or not --- or if he is attractive to us -- but even if he turns us on we don't have sex unless he really is into us. Who wants a man that is not?

[Gutpiler_Utahn]

I'm not going to say I don't care about looks, but to say that I'm shallow is misleading too. When it comes to looks, I have to be attracted, even if it's just SOME. She can't be ugly to me or it's going nowhere. As for brains, this gets more important to me the older I get. I've been in so many relationships where we will strike up a conversation and it turns into a dissertation of what I already know and they never even considered. I HATE those kinds of conversations. I love to be able to make a woman think outside the realm of her own paradigm, but all too often, I'm left wanting. Sure I really like the physical aspect of a relationship, but I can attest that a marraige based soley on hot, passionate sex will still only last 5-7 years... Damn I miss that sometimes... :naughty: :haha:

In all seriousness though, I want a woman who can keep up with me physically AND mentally. Like when you're hiking/biking in the outdoors... you don't want to be with somebody you always have to stop and wait for them to catch up or even one who leaves you in the dust. Where's the joy in that? :ne_nau: Oh... and whatever is left missing (to an extent) great sex certainly fills in the gaps and makes life better. :naughty: :twisted:

[Randi]

[color=white]A man does not have to be off the chart handsome or confident .... he just has to make the woman feel as if she is special, beautiful. etc... (at least with me. I can't speak for all women since most seem very different from me.)




I do not care if a man looks like a model .. in fact I hate that look haha: -- but some looks are attractive to me and others are not. I love the young William Shanter look... even though I like much older men (he really went downhill though as he got older) ~sigh~

http://trekmovie.com/wp-content/uploads/poslash.JPG

Spocks does not turn me on... too tall, too skinny... not so passionate. :lol8:


OMG~ It is so funny Tanya, how alike "we" aren't!
Spock is the one I always liked!
To me, Spock was the HOTTEST star-trek guy out of all of them! :naughty:
I LOVE a hairy chest on a guy too!
None of this shaved chest nonsense!
Guys in the OC do that...don't know if it goes on in Utah, but I think it's unattractive.

And the second most attractive one was Leiutenant Sulu!
Guess I like dark-haired-skinny-smart over the blond beefcake look? :mrgreen:

[tanya]

OMG~ It is so funny Tanya, how alike "we" aren't!
Spock is the one I always liked!
To me, Spock was the HOTTEST star-trek guy out of all of them! :naughty:
I LOVE a hairy chest on a guy too!
None of this shaved chest nonsense!
Guys in the OC do that...don't know if it goes on in Utah, but I think it's unattractive.

And the second most attractive one was Leiutenant Sulu!
Guess I like dark-haired-skinny-smart over the blond beefcake look? :mrgreen:


Yeah... we are total opposites except I do like natural men. I don't want one that shaves anything but his face. I don't mind a full beard but I don't like just a mustache.

I always though Sulu was gay :mrgreen:

Second most attractive to me was Uhura. :haha:

http://www.daviddarling.info/images/Mirror_Mirror.jpg

The scar in this shot helps though. :mrgreen:

[tanya]

I'm not going to say I don't care about looks, but to say that I'm shallow is misleading too. When it comes to looks, I have to be attracted, even if it's just SOME. She can't be ugly to me or it's going nowhere. As for brains, this gets more important to me the older I get. I've been in so many relationships where we will strike up a conversation and it turns into a dissertation of what I already know and they never even considered. I HATE those kinds of conversations. I love to be able to make a woman think outside the realm of her own paradigm, but all too often, I'm left wanting. Sure I really like the physical aspect of a relationship, but I can attest that a marriage based solely on hot, passionate sex will still only last 5-7 years... Damn I miss that sometimes... :naughty: :haha:

In all seriousness though, I want a woman who can keep up with me physically AND mentally. Like when you're hiking/biking in the outdoors... you don't want to be with somebody you always have to stop and wait for them to catch up or even one who leaves you in the dust. Where's the joy in that? :ne_nau: Oh... and whatever is left missing (to an extent) great sex certainly fills in the gaps and makes life better. :naughty: :twisted:

I think a marriage that is based just on sex would be awesome! I have always thought that kids, bills, housework, family, etc... ruin the sex life and make a marriage old -- make it into more of a partnership between 2 friends that enjoy being together but the sex life is not all it use to be.

But! What if you don't have kids and never talk about the other stuff.... just have the sex part! Sort of like a date each night... dinner... sex... fun.... no talk of troubles, no kids... just sex!

[sparker1]

Brains vs boobs? I prefer brainy boobs. :cool2:

I've watched my wife grow older and I still find her attractive and sexy. She hasn't gained weight, I have. Somehow she still manages to put up with me. There's something there other than simple brains vs beauty.

[Gutpiler_Utahn]

I think a marriage that is based just on sex would be awesome! I have always thought that kids, bills, housework, family, etc... ruin the sex life and make a marriage old -- make it into more of a partnership between 2 friends that enjoy being together but the sex life is not all it use to be.

But! What if you don't have kids and never talk about the other stuff.... just have the sex part! Sort of like a date each night... dinner... sex... fun.... no talk of troubles, no kids... just sex!

Don't get me wrong, the sex was great... always was. I miss that aspect, and she has said she does too, but if all you have is sex and little else in common... well, she didn't much like me a lot of the time. :ne_nau:





... damn... I need to start dating again. :haha: :naughty:

[DirkHammergate]

I'm not going to say I don't care about looks, but to say that I'm shallow is misleading too. When it comes to looks, I have to be attracted, even if it's just SOME. She can't be ugly to me or it's going nowhere. As for brains, this gets more important to me the older I get. I've been in so many relationships where we will strike up a conversation and it turns into a dissertation of what I already know and they never even considered. I HATE those kinds of conversations. I love to be able to make a woman think outside the realm of her own paradigm, but all too often, I'm left wanting. Sure I really like the physical aspect of a relationship, but I can attest that a marriage based solely on hot, passionate sex will still only last 5-7 years... Damn I miss that sometimes... :naughty: :haha:

In all seriousness though, I want a woman who can keep up with me physically AND mentally. Like when you're hiking/biking in the outdoors... you don't want to be with somebody you always have to stop and wait for them to catch up or even one who leaves you in the dust. Where's the joy in that? :ne_nau: Oh... and whatever is left missing (to an extent) great sex certainly fills in the gaps and makes life better. :naughty: :twisted:

I think a marriage that is based just on sex would be awesome! I have always thought that kids, bills, housework, family, etc... ruin the sex life and make a marriage old -- make it into more of a partnership between 2 friends that enjoy being together but the sex life is not all it use to be.

But! What if you don't have kids and never talk about the other stuff.... just have the sex part! Sort of like a date each night... dinner... sex... fun.... no talk of troubles, no kids... just sex!

Yeah, that's not bad but at the end of the day when someone says to you "Thank you for Sex" and then you leave for a few days, sort of detached, it leaves you with a weird sensation, even me and i'm pretty jaded.

[greyhair biker]

believe it or not most people grow up to be just ordinary people. If you're looking for fantastic sex in a partner you better start making it happen if that is what you want in a relationship. Most people want to feel loved and to love...to have a sense of security. Mind blowing sex is that way partially because you feel the passion between the two of you, not just because you want a good lay. I believe sex gets better the more you grow together.
A 'business partnership' is just that. A real WORKING marriage takes WORK and is rocky at times.
One of my favorite quotes, which was'nt at first but has made more sense over time, is, and I paraphrase and only use part of, is "Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he has been robbed. Most putts dont drop, Most beef is tough..." it goes on but the point is -life is what you make it.

[savanna3313]

It's about chemistry as much as looks. 10 men can look at 1 woman and have 10 different opinions. A guy doesn't have to be drop dead gorgeous, but he does have to have one main thing as far as I'm concerned (a hoohaw is a given, ok Sparky?) :haha: He's got to have a sense of humor. If not, we're dead in the water from the get-go.

:popcorn:

[Iceaxe]

http://logo.cafepress.com/8/3666421.3375138.jpg

[rockgremlin]

But! What if you don't have kids and never talk about the other stuff.... just have the sex part! Sort of like a date each night... dinner... sex... fun.... no talk of troubles, no kids... just sex![/color]

Isn't that what girlfriends are for? :haha:

[rockgremlin]

What happens if the woman you love and married and are stuck with for life gains 75 lbs, cuts off her hair and gets leather skin from so much sun time? Do you still love her and want sex with her?[/color]

Love her? Yes. Physically attracted to her? Ummmm...probably much less so.

I think it's important to maintain yourself physically attractive for your spouse. I don't buy into the mindset that once married, you outta be attracted to your spouse no matter what. Wedding vows are not a good excuse for adopting an unhealthy and unattractive lifestyle (ie obesity).

[hank moon]

I think it's important to maintain yourself physically attractive for your spouse. I don't buy into the mindset that once married, you outta be attracted to your spouse no matter what. Wedding vows are not a good excuse for adopting an unhealthy and unattractive lifestyle (ie obesity).

Nevertheless, marriage usually means a dramatic reduction in self-marketing activities such as appearance upkeep (physical or otherwise). A chief benefit of marriage being so-called security, it's only natural that complacency reduces the need...

[savanna3313]

OMG~ It is so funny Tanya, how alike "we" aren't!
Spock is the one I always liked!
To me, Spock was the HOTTEST star-trek guy out of all of them! :naughty:
I LOVE a hairy chest on a guy too!
None of this shaved chest nonsense!
Guys in the OC do that...don't know if it goes on in Utah, but I think it's unattractive.

And the second most attractive one was Leiutenant Sulu!
Guess I like dark-haired-skinny-smart over the blond beefcake look? :mrgreen:

I'm with you Randi......I don't like the shaved chest (and everything else) look either. Guess that means I'm "old school" but I like a man to look like a man. Well - within reason I suppose......I don't like hair all over the shoulders and back. My sisters and I have a word we use for that - *snyfo* Don't ask. :haha: Nothing beats a manly chest with some nice chest hair (think Tom Selleck in Magnum PI) :naughty:

Oh.....btw Randi - I hate to break it to you, but Sulu has come out of the closet and announced he's gay. :ne_nau:

[DirkHammergate]

http://logo.cafepress.com/8/3666421.3375138.jpg


I kept them clean through my drought, I hate hair and that business about its cool to be Tom Selleck, Com'on.... that's what one of my girls said, but she can't get enough of the clean stuff.

[Cirrus2000]

http://logo.cafepress.com/8/3666421.3375138.jpg


I kept them clean through my drought, I hate hair and that business about its cool to be Tom Selleck, Com'on.... that's what one of my girls said, but she can't get enough of the clean stuff.

TMFI!

:puke8:

[accadacca]

http://logo.cafepress.com/8/3666421.3375138.jpg


I kept them clean through my drought, I hate hair and that business about its cool to be Tom Selleck, Com'on.... that's what one of my girls said, but she can't get enough of the clean stuff.

TMFI!

:puke8:
:roll_lol: :roll_lol: :roll_lol:

[DirkHammergate]

Hilarious!

[denaliguide]

brains or beauty? ron white has put it nicely. marry for brains, cause you can't fix stupid.

[tanya]

I'm not going to say I don't care about looks, but to say that I'm shallow is misleading too. When it comes to looks, I have to be attracted, even if it's just SOME. She can't be ugly to me or it's going nowhere. As for brains, this gets more important to me the older I get. I've been in so many relationships where we will strike up a conversation and it turns into a dissertation of what I already know and they never even considered. I HATE those kinds of conversations. I love to be able to make a woman think outside the realm of her own paradigm, but all too often, I'm left wanting. Sure I really like the physical aspect of a relationship, but I can attest that a marriage based solely on hot, passionate sex will still only last 5-7 years... Damn I miss that sometimes... :naughty: :haha:

In all seriousness though, I want a woman who can keep up with me physically AND mentally. Like when you're hiking/biking in the outdoors... you don't want to be with somebody you always have to stop and wait for them to catch up or even one who leaves you in the dust. Where's the joy in that? :ne_nau: Oh... and whatever is left missing (to an extent) great sex certainly fills in the gaps and makes life better. :naughty: :twisted:

I think a marriage that is based just on sex would be awesome! I have always thought that kids, bills, housework, family, etc... ruin the sex life and make a marriage old -- make it into more of a partnership between 2 friends that enjoy being together but the sex life is not all it use to be.

But! What if you don't have kids and never talk about the other stuff.... just have the sex part! Sort of like a date each night... dinner... sex... fun.... no talk of troubles, no kids... just sex!

Yeah, that's not bad but at the end of the day when someone says to you "Thank you for Sex" and then you leave for a few days, sort of detached, it leaves you with a weird sensation, even me and i'm pretty jaded.


But guys!!! Your idea of sex and a females is not the same! We think of sex along with total love, intense passion and desire... with that burning to be with a man... the love of his scent.... the need for his touch...

vs...

talking kids and bills.

[tanya]

http://logo.cafepress.com/8/3666421.3375138.jpg


:mrgreen: Please don't! You are just perfect how you are. No effeminate behavior required. :roll:

[tanya]

I think it's important to maintain yourself physically attractive for your spouse. I don't buy into the mindset that once married, you outta be attracted to your spouse no matter what. Wedding vows are not a good excuse for adopting an unhealthy and unattractive lifestyle (ie obesity).

Nevertheless, marriage usually means a dramatic reduction in self-marketing activities such as appearance upkeep (physical or otherwise). A chief benefit of marriage being so-called security, it's only natural that complacency reduces the need...


Having babies and raising them takes a toll!!!!!! :ne_nau:

[tanya]

believe it or not most people grow up to be just ordinary people. If you're looking for fantastic sex in a partner you better start making it happen if that is what you want in a relationship. Most people want to feel loved and to love...to have a sense of security. Mind blowing sex is that way partially because you feel the passion between the two of you, not just because you want a good lay. I believe sex gets better the more you grow together.
A 'business partnership' is just that. A real WORKING marriage takes WORK and is rocky at times.
One of my favorite quotes, which was'nt at first but has made more sense over time, is, and I paraphrase and only use part of, is "Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he has been robbed. Most putts dont drop, Most beef is tough..." it goes on but the point is -life is what you make it.

It's good to hear you have it together with your wife and are not looking elsewhere for all that love, lust and such. :haha:

[tanya]

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I kept them clean through my drought, I hate hair and that business about its cool to be Tom Selleck, Com'on.... that's what one of my girls said, but she can't get enough of the clean stuff.

TMFI!

:puke8:

:roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol:

Too much information I suppose.

[DirkHammergate]

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I kept them clean through my drought, I hate hair and that business about its cool to be Tom Selleck, Com'on.... that's what one of my girls said, but she can't get enough of the clean stuff.

TMFI!

:puke8:

:roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol: :roflol:

Too much information I suppose.

I'm a bundle of TMFI.

[Randi]

[quote=Randi]

OMG~ It is so funny Tanya, how alike "we" aren't!
Spock is the one I always liked!
To me, Spock was the HOTTEST star-trek guy out of all of them! :naughty:
I LOVE a hairy chest on a guy too!
None of this shaved chest nonsense!
Guys in the OC do that...don't know if it goes on in Utah, but I think it's unattractive.

And the second most attractive one was Leiutenant Sulu!
Guess I like dark-haired-skinny-smart over the blond beefcake look? :mrgreen:


I'm with you Randi......I don't like the shaved chest (and everything else) look either. Guess that means I'm "old school" but I like a man to look like a man. Well - within reason I suppose......I don't like hair all over the shoulders and back. My sisters and I have a word we use for that - *snyfo* Don't ask. Nothing beats a manly chest with some nice chest hair (think Tom Selleck in Magnum PI)

~ I

[tanya]

[quote=Randi][
~I find lots of guys attractive; young, old, gay, straight, manly, effeminate, whatever.
I think so much of the attraction for me really revolves around the fact that they

[Randi]

You

[tanya]

[quote=Randi]You